Talking to Janice today about our scheduled lunch on Saturday, I was a bit surprised to hear that she had an "announcement" to make, better told in person. As far as I'm concerned, there's only one thing this can be, and now I have to spend the next two days trying to figure out how to act happy for her. That's going to be hard to do.

The way I see it, she's likely gotten engaged to her boyfriend. True, he's of a more appropriate age for settling down than she is, but this is still not good. Why the cynicism you may ask? Well, aside from the fact that I'm cynical about everything, I have very specific problems with my friends getting married. Many of my issues with this move are identical to those I had with Vanessa's engagement to Kris. First, she's waaaaaay too young. Twenty-one is only an acceptable age to get married if the guy is in the military, or it's 1954. Second, they certainly haven't known each other long enough. No couple that meets online needs to be engaged less than six months later, especially when they've only been dating for a portion of that time. Third, she's just gone through a traumatic experience, and I doubt that her judgment is unclouded. While I applaud Thomas for having been so supportive and sleeping at the hospital while she was so ill, I think that she may need to take whatever impact that illness had on her, and discover herself, not worry about pleasing some one else. This part is a bit tainted by my personal need for independence, but I still believe that it's valid. She's in school, and working toward something new. She doesn't need to be planning a life for two. She needs to be finding out what the world holds for her. Fourth, she's been engaged before, and I would have thought that she'd have learned her lesson then. She's smart enough that all of the things I've mentioned should have impressed themselves on her before this point, say when she was staring at the unworn wedding dress hanging in her closet at the ripe old age of 19.

I guess that my last point, and one even more subjective than all of the others is that I think Thomas may just be in a rush to settle down. He's 27 and has been married before. He's a nice guy, but maybe a bit co-dependent. I think that's what scares me about the situation. I think that he might need her a little too much, and so she'll end up limiting herself and her career in order to make him happy, and that's just not right.

Well, who knows, I could end up being completely wrong. Either way, I'll have to work on my party smile. I learned from the Vanessa debacle that when this announcement is made, no one actually wants your honest opinion, they just want to be told how great their decision is and how happy they will be.