Something I'll never stop wondering is why it hurts so much to see an ex dating some one even when you're not interested. Does it just drive home my own feelings of insecurity and the fact that he's with some one when I'm not? Is it just that I'm terribly anxious over the changes in my life and the fact that I'm about to meet a lot of new people? Do I just have some egotistical need for him to be in love with me? Is it that I'm looking for something to come of an unsatisfying relationship? Have the circumstances of my youth led me to want even bad relationships to work and be forever? On that line is seems odd to me that I am constantly trying to create the illusion of permanence in my life while striving toward constant change. I want everything to just be the same, but I always feel like there's got to be something better.

So...?

Will I ever be good enough?